Start All Over
by Meaghan Gibson
Summary: Miley falls under the pressure of her life. She becomes the most popular girl in school, and hates the transition. When it all becomes too much, she attempts suicide, landing her in the Malibu Female Institution where she meets Lilly. Eventually Liley.
1. A change of scenery

**Ok, I'm sorry if I haven't updated much on Lilly You Can't Fix Everything, but I've been a bit down in the dumps. I just haven't felt much like writing.. I guess I've been a bit depressed. Idk what it is, it's also because I'm kind of stuck. Idk, I'll try to update soon, but for now I want to get a new story up. I'm kind of bored of my old one, I'm waiting for a genius idea, so I can like it again. It just seems so dull to me.. How the hell do you guys read it? lol Anyways, here's my new story.. I've been having this idea, and got bored just now and decided to do some writing. :] Tell me how you like it when you're done reading.**

* * *

Everything is dark, I hear voices all around me but can't find the strength to open my eyes. I hear familiar voices and people saying my name. What the hell is that beeping sound? If this is a dream, I can hardly call it a dream. It feels more like a nightmare. Soon, the voices fade away and I drift off into a deep slumber.

"Miley... Miley!" A voice says, causing me to snap back to reality. I look up and find an old blond haired woman sitting in front of me behind a desk. I don't say anything, but simply observe my surroundings. I take it all in and let out a shaky sigh, finally responding to the unfamiliar person in front of me.

"W...Where am I?" I ask confused, pondering the possibilities.

"You're at the Malibu Female institution.... Don't you remember?" The woman asks, looking confused.

"Like.. a mental hospital?" I ask, suddenly remembering everything that had happened the day before. I swallow hard and prepare myself for the worst. "So... It wasn't a dream?"

"I'm afraid not Ms. Stewart, what could possibly make you want to end your life? From what I've heard from your family, things are pretty good for you. Good grades, a lot of friends, head cheerleader, the perfect boyfriend... " I cut her off, disgusted at how my life has become, I can't bare to listen to the sickening words used to describe me. I would prefer something more like Miley Stewart, free spirit, music lover, friendly, loving, all around good person. What I've become isn't really who I am. I can't stand it. It's not me, and I just had to get away from it all.

"That's exactly why.. It's over rated.. " I say flatly, looking out the window with a look of disgust covering my face.

"Isn't that the life that every teenage girl dreams of? What's so bad about having good grades and a lot of people who like you?" She asks seriously.

"Like me!? Try want to be me.. They don't like me, they don't even know me, you could hardly say they look up to me, it's all jealousy.. It's sickening." I say, leaning back in my chair and looking up at the ceiling.

"Why didn't you just change it? Suicide is never the answer." She says seriously, but she apparently doesn't know my life. In fact, she doesn't know anything about me. She doesn't know how much pressure comes with the title, she doesn't know what it takes.. She doesn't know anything.

"Look lady, you don't know me, you don't know anything about me, you obviously don't understand the pressure that comes with being perfect. You don't understand what it's like, so stop assuming that you do. You obviously don't know anything, or you wouldn't have asked such a _stupid_ question." I say rudely, crossing my arms with a look of disgust on my face.

"Ms. Stewart, I'm only trying to help.. We need to get a firm understanding on your situation before we can help you.."

"You can't help me, unless you've got a time machine.. Do you? No? Didn't think so.. Can we just get to the point so I can get the hell out of here." I say, hoping I can go home.

"Well, you have counseling with me twice a week, you'll need to take the medication we give you. If there are any problems with the medication, you'll have to talk to me about it. Otherwise, you just have to take it willingly or be shown the hard way. Patty will show you where you'll be staying, eating, and give you the basic information.."

"Wait... How long am I going to be here?" I ask curiously, wondering why she's explaining all this to me.

"Your father signed you in for a 70 day treatment. Most girls in your situation have found the treatment helpful. We're almost positive that this is what you need."

"70 days!? Are you fucking kidding me?! How the hell do you know what I need?! You don't fuckin know me!" I say, as I stand up taking a threatening step closer to her and gripping onto the edge of her desk.

"Ms. Stewart, you need to calm down." She says while picking up the phone and gesturing for me to sit back down.

"Hello.. Patty? Could you come escort the lovely Ms. Stewart to her room.. No.... yes.... Please... Alright.. bye." I roll my eyes in response while letting out a heavy sigh. This isn't going to be easy.

"If I show improvement, can I get out before 70 days?" I ask, as a tall woman grabs onto my wrist and begins pulling me to the door.

"It all depends on you Ms. Stewart. We'll talk about that at your next meeting with your family." She says waving goodbye as I'm pulled out of the room.

"Ok, this is the living room, feel free to come in here whenever you like, this is where most of the girls hang out." I look around and observe the other girls in the room. They're all looking me up and down as if it's prison and I'm the fresh new meat. For once people are looking down at me instead of looking up to me. It's kind of nice, I could get used to this. Maybe a fresh start will do me good. I could work with this.

"This is the art room, you all come in here every Thursday and Mrs. Wilson will be in charge of the activities here." The room is filled with several instruments, tables, and art supplies. My eyes are caught on a beautiful acoustic guitar.

"Are we allowed to come in here and use the instruments?" I ask, already forming a plan of how I'll spend my days.

"Yes, but none of the other girls do. They only care about the TV, so if that's what you plan on doing, you'll basically have the room all to yourself." Her answer makes me smile widely.

"Cool." She drags me out of the room, but I can't stop thinking about that guitar. Finally she pulls me up to a window with a couple woman sitting behind it.

"And this is where you take your medicine. They'll call you up when you need to take it. This is Stacy and Geena." She says, introducing me to what I assume are the nurses.

"Hi, I'm Miley." I say, my gaze never leaving the art room.

"You must be Ms. Stewart." I hear one of them say, but I don't answer.

"Come on Miley, you seem a bit tired, I'll take you to your room." I feel her drag me off by my wrist, but keep looking in the direction of the art room. When we come to a stop, I avert my gaze to the door in front of us. Patty pushes open the door to a small room with two beds. I instantly notice that one of the beds is occupied by a blond girl curled up in the fetal position, staring at the wall. I don't enjoy the idea of having to share a room, but decide on being friendly. Maybe we'll become good friends.

"This is where you'll be staying... And this.... is Lilly Truscott." She says the last part quietly, looking away. Why on earth is she acting this way. I pull away from Patty's grasp and walk over to blond girl who is now my roommate. I offer her my hand, but she doesn't take it, instead she lets out a quiet laugh.

"Wow, are you kidding me. Patty is this my new roommate?" She says, letting out another laugh causing me to frown a bit. She stands up and circles me, looking me up and down. "Let me guess... Goody two shoes rich girl? Probably attempted suicide? Good life, good grades, but depressed for no reason? Am I right Miley?" She says in an almost taunting manner. I can't help but assume somebody has already told her about me. She already had my story down, but it was the way she said it that upset me.

"Shut up..." I say quietly, not moving my gaze from the floor.

"Aww, did poor Miley get her feelings hurt? We wouldn't want her to have to kill herself again now would we? No that would just be a shame. It's not like this world could go without some snobby rich bitch." She says rudely, her voice dripping with sarcasm while sending a shooting pain through my heart. Her words hurt me, she doesn't even know me and she's already judging me.

"Shut up......" I say again, but quieter this time.

"Why? Am I hurting your feelings? Oh no." She says, letting out a fake gasp. Patty had already left the room. Lucky me, they send the lady who's afraid of my roommate to escort me here.

"You don't know anything about me..." I say, moving over to my bed and laying down, deciding that I can't let her get to me. If I let her know it bothers me, she'll probably keep going.

"I know all I need to know. Don't think I don't know you. Don't think I don't know about your perfect family, your nice house, all your friends..."

"Who are you?" I say, looking up at her in disbelief.. Do I know this girl? Did she go to my school?

"I'm Lilly Truscott, your new roommate." She says bitterly as she stomps off out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Boy is this going to be fun. Leave it to me to get the girl who I've pissed off in the past. Who is this girl? She seems so familiar... I decide to just shake it off, and ignore her. This girl obviously has some serious issues, I don't want to get on her bad side. I let out a sigh and drift off into sleep.

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**Ok, I've never been in a mental hospital, so I don't know what they're like. I've seen a couple movies about them, so I have a small idea. If my information is way off, I'm sorry.. Anyways, R&R ppl. :P**


	2. This is going to be a bumpy ride

**Here you go, hope you guys enjoy.**

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I wake to an empty room, not that I expected her to be here. She didn't seem too happy with me being her roommate. What am I supposed to do about it though? She just kept jumping to conclusions. If she's not even going to attempt to get to know me, I'm not going to make an effort either. I have to go to the bathroom, so I leave the room desperatly trying to remember where the bathroom was at. I walk down the dark hallway observing every door hoping to find the bathroom. When I come across Mrs. McGee's office I hear talking and feel a bit nosy. I press my ear against the door and try to hear the conversation.

"Why can't you just let me have my own room?" I hear a familiar voice say.

"Lilly, you know I can't give you a special treatment just because I'm your Aunt. Did you even try to get to know her?" I hear Mrs. McGee say to the girl I recognized as Lilly. I feel like I should pull away, but can't bring myself to do it. I knew who they were talking about, and I had to know more.

"I don't need to, she's just like the rest of these rich bitches." This makes me a bit mad, but my curiosity gets the better of me and I listen on.

"Well, what about Sarah? You got along with her fine. You don't think her parents had to pay big bucks to get her in here?"

"Sarah was different." She says simply..

"Yeah, because you got to know her. You never know, you and Miley might have a lot more in common than you think." The fact that she's sticking up for me makes me happy, and I decide to listen on, hoping Lilly will take her advice.

"I doubt it..." I shake my head at her reply.

"Will you at least try?"

"If it'll get me outta here."

"Lilly you know I can't do that."

"Why the hell not? You got me in here.. Can't you get me out?"

"Legally, no, your mom signed you into our care, and until she feels you've made improvements we can't let you out. Maybe if you'd stop trying to escape we'd let you out."

"Maybe if you'd let me out, I'd stop trying to escape." I laugh a bit when she says this, continuing to listen in.

"Whatever Lilly, just try to get to know Miley. You never know, she could be like Sarah." I smile again, hoping that Lilly will come around and take her advice.

"First of all, I doubt she's anything like Sarah. Second of all, you know why I don't get close to any of these girls, they all have to leave some time. It's just not worth getting attached when they'll all eventually leave me." Upon hearing this I can't help but feel sad. Was it because she practically just insulted me? Was it.... perhaps... compassion?

"Hon, you could leave too, if you would just let us try to help you, you'd be out of here sooner than you think."

"Whatever, I'm gonna go lay down."

"Ok, goodnight sweetie."

I hear footsteps approaching the door and hurry off towards the bathrooms. So Lilly actually has a heart? What a shock. I'm glad Mrs. McGee talked to her about me. I don't know if I could deal with staying here if Lilly were to continue treating me this way. She doesn't know anything about me, yet insists upon jumping to conclusions. Yeah, I'm the typical popular rich girl stereotype, but under the image there's a helpless girl crying out for help just like her. Maybe she'll she that one day. From what I heard, Lilly's not just some bitch. I could tell she has feelings, maybe I can get through her hard exterior and find that sweet girl inside. Was it worth it though?

I get back into our room, and Lilly's already asleep. I decide to do the same. I have no idea what's going to happen tomorrow.

* * *

I wake up when I feel the bed shift, and can tell somebody is sitting next to me. I look up, rubbing my eyes to find a tan skinned girl with long, curly dark hair and brown eyes.

"mmm what do you want?" I ask groggily.

"I was sent to wake you up, you're new here, so they're going a bit easy on you today. Just don't get used to sleeping in so late." The girl says jokingly, laughing a bit.

"Why'd they send you?" I ask, now sitting up as I let out a loud yawn and stretch a bit.

"Well, they did ask Lilly at first, but she wasn't too fond of the idea." Her answer doesn't shock me. From what I heard last night, Lilly doesn't even want to try to get to know me.

"Whats her problem? Is she always so mean?" I ask, hoping I can get more information out of the girl beside me.

"That's Lilly for you. You might as well get used to it, she treats everybody that way." She says rolling her eyes and leaning back shifting her weight so she's resting on her elbows.

"Why? What's her problem?" I ask, a bit curious about my new roommate.

"She just doesn't like us, she just assumes we're all bitches because our parents can afford to put us in here.." She says, shaking her head at the thought.

"How'd she get in here if she didn't pay for it?" I ask curiously, having a slight idea of the answer from what i heard last night.

"Her aunt owns the place. You'd think they'd let her crazy ass out after two years. She's a lost cause." She says, standing up and offering me her hand. I take it and smile at her, happy to have somebody to talk to.

"What's wrong with her? Why is she in here?" I ask while following her down the hallway.

"Nobody knows, she only ever talked to her last roommate Sarah.. She doesn't even talk in group."

"Oh.. So I guess I should give up on her ever being nice to me huh?" I ask, a bit disappointed about what I've found out about Lilly.

"Yeah, don't even waste your time. You can hang out with me. I'm Mikayla by the way." She says, offering me her hand.

"I'm Miley." I say smiling accepting her hand.

"Well Miley, what do you want to do? I've been asked to show you around. You've got about an hour until you meet with Mrs. McGee. You can take a shower, go eat, watch tv, come hang out with me. It's up to you." She says smiling, waiting patiently for my answer.

"Well, I kind of need to shower.. Don't they have to watch me though? Like in case I'm going to try it again?" I ask curiously, hoping I can have a bit of privacy.

"Normally in your case, you would be under strict watch, but they're giving you a bit of freedom since you're new here. They've appointed me to show you around and make sure you don't get into any trouble. So basically, until you give them a reason not to trust you, you're good to go. I have to be in the bathroom with you, though. Any other place you can go alone. If you need to shave, I have to go with you to ask patty for a razor, and I have to watch to make sure you don't try to hurt yourself." She says, trying to make things a bit more clear to me.

"Wait, if you're a patient here, then why are you showing me around. How do they know you won't just come in there with me and try to kill yourself too?" I ask, a bit confused as to why they can trust another crazy teenager to watch me.

"Oh, I'm not a threat to myself or others. I just have an anxiety disorder. I'm only in here for another week, so I get to help out with new patients." I feel a bit sad that she's not going to be around for much longer, but shake it off.

"So basically you're going to watch me bathe? That's much better." I say sarcastically, a bit embarrassed by the idea.

"Well, it's either me, Lilly, or Patty. You take your pick." she says, laughing a bit.

"Well, in that case, I guess I'm stuck with you." I say jokingly, hitting her shoulder in a playful manner.

"Don't worry, I don't bite.. Much." she says, offering me a playful wink.

"Well you might want to watch out there Mikay, I might like that." I say, winking back playfully. She let's out a laugh in return and grabs my hand, leading me into the bathroom.

"You better hurry up, you have your therapy soon. Brace yourself for a traumatic session."

"traumatic? Why is it traumatic?" I ask, a bit afraid of the answer.

"This is the fun part where you get to find out what your family thinks of you. I'm warning you, it can get a bit ugly in there. Nobody likes to hear it, but hey, the truth hurts." I swallow hard and become a bit nervous. I know they're probably really upset. I've been such a burden on them. I have no idea how they feel about me attempting suicide. I know my dad has strong opinions against it. I never really expected myself to be in this situation. I didn't think I was going to live. I wonder what they're going to say.

_Brace yourself Miley, this is going to be a bumpy ride._

_

* * *

_

When I'm finished with my shower, Mikayla and I go our separate ways. I walk down to Mrs. McGee's office feeling nervous. My heart is racing. I can't even imagine how they feel. They probably feel hurt, betrayed.. They probably think I abandoned them. Oh god, I don't know if I can do this. Before I can change my mind and turn away, the door in front of me opens and Mrs. McGee is standing in front of me smiling.

"Miley, you're right on time. Take a seat." I walk over to the empty seat next to my Dad and Jackson and sit quietly, trying not to make eye contact.

"Ok, Robbie, would you like to start?"

"Sure." I hear him say quietly.

"Miley, it won't hurt you to look at him." I hear Mrs. McGee say. I swallow hard and let out a shaky breath that I didn't even know I was holding. I look up at him and recognize a look of hurt in his eyes. I hadn't seen that look on his face since my mother died. I can't help but feel like a complete bitch when I see this. I am mentally beating myself up for putting that look on his face. My father has always been there for me. I in no way wanted to hurt him. I just wasn't thinking straight. I was an idiot. I never considered how it would make them feel.

"Miles, you know I love you and just want for you to be happy.... I just... I can't deal with this anymore..." He says, sounding a bit apprehensive.

"Can't deal with it anymore? You mean you can't deal with _me_ anymore?! Just say it Dad, I get it." I say rudely, becoming a bit angry by his words.

"Miles, don't do this...." He says, beginning to cry as he looks down.

"Why can't I just come home Dad?" I say, almost pleadingly.

"Miles, you need help... I don't think we can give you the kind of help you need..." He says, still not looking up at me. My jaw drops when I hear what he says.

"We?? Jackson?? You too? You guys are going to leave me here??" Neither of them reply, they don't even look at me. "I can't believe what I'm hearing. My own family is going to abandon me."

"Now Miles, you know that's not true! You abandoned us! You're the one who tried to take your own life!" He says, now standing up angrilly.

"Whatever Dad, you're overreacting." I say, shaking it off, not wanting to admit that I truly had abandoned them. The thought itself scares me beyond no end.

"Overreacting!?? Miles! Do you know what it's like walking into a bathroom to see your daughter sprawled out on the floor with an empty pill bottle, my bottle of whiskey, and her wrists carved up like a God danged Thanksgiving Turkey?!" He says, now pacing back and forth. His words hit me hard, the night had almost completely left my memory. I don't remember my Dad walking in, or even remember going to the hospital. I feel horrible that my Dad had to see that, what was I thinking? I just needed to get away, I couldn't deal with it, but I never considered how it was going to make my family feel. I begin to cry at realization of my Dad having to see me in such a state.

"I'm sorry..." I manage out quietly as I begin to cry harder.

"Miley, I don't know what would possibly make you do such a thing, but it's not going to happen again. I want the old Miley back. My little girl, and his sister. I don't know how to make that happen, so that's why you're here. Please Miles, just go through with this..... For us?" He asks, sitting back down and hugging me tightly.

"Ok... I will." I say quietly, not hugging him back, still in such shock as I remembered my Dad walking in that night.

"Well, this went well. We'll see you in a few months Mr. Stewart." Mrs. McGee says, offering him her hand.

"Wait... I don't even get to see them the whole time I'm here?" I ask confused, a bit sad at the thought of being without them for so long.

"I'm sorry, no. It's part of the program." She says, looking a bit sympathetic.

"Wow, and I thought it couldn't get any worse." I say sadly.

"I'm sorry Miles, I love you... It's for the best..." My Dad says as him and Jackson walk out of the room. I begin to cry harder than before, barely able to catch my breath. My heart speeds up and I find myself gasping for air. I feel like the room is spinning, and everything being said seems to echo and pound against my head.

"Miley, hon.. It's going to be ok.." I hear, but don't reply, I can't find the strength to speak. _Why didn't Jackson talk to me or even look at me?_

"Somebody help her, get her to her room." I heard her say again in a more panicked tone of voice. I am now being lifted off the floor, but don't care. I lie limp in somebody's arms. I don't speak, don't open my eyes, just remain in my thoughts.

_Why didn't he even talk to me? He knew he wasn't going to see me for months.. He couldn't even say hi.. Tell me he loved me? Does he still love me? _

I feel my bed beneath me and somebody pulling my blankets over me. I don't even look up. I remain there in my current position, thinking about everything that had just happened. I lay there for hours thinking about everything that had just happened. After a while, I eventually fell asleep.

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**Sorry if the updates are a bit short, I promise when it gets going I'll add some long chapters. I hope you guys don't hate it too much. It's going to take a while to get to the Liley, but I hope you'll be willing to stick around. Just trust me, it's going to get better. R&R ppl. :P**


	3. Why are you in my dreams?

**Ok, sorry about the lack of fast updates but I haven't had internet because the modem broke, so we have to wait until Monday to call the people to get it all sorted out. Once it's fixed and working again, I'll be back to several updates. Also, if you message me, I probably won't reply because of this issue. Sorry. :[  
**

* * *

**Miley's Dream**

_"Do you trust me?" My boyfriend Jake says, looking down at me. There's a look of complete lust in his eyes, nothing more. His painful grip on my shoulders is less than comfortable. It's almost as if he's trying to hold me in place until he gets the answer he wants to hear._

_"I love you." He says halfheartedly. When I go to say something, no words come out. I feel an agonizing pain in my chest as I'm gasping for air. I try desperately to breathe, move, speak, say anything..... nothing. Without an answer, Jake forcefully continues to do what he had asked. I squeeze my eyes shut, hoping desperately for the painful moment to end. Suddenly, all the pain stops, and I'm able to breath. I feel peaceful, content, happy. I open my eyes to see Lilly on top of me, looking down at me lovingly._

_"Do you trust me?" She asks, concern written all over her face. She looks so kind, so loving, so... perfect. _

_"With my life." I say, smiling._

_"I love you." She says simply, completely sincere. I could tell she meant it with all of her heart._

_"I love you too, forever and always." I say, meaning every word of it. She leans in and places a gentle kiss on my neck, proceeding with a trail of gentle kisses up my cheek. She stops and looks into my eyes, giving me such a loving smile that it sends chills up and down my entire body. She leans in so our lips are less than an inch apart. I feel her warm, steady breathing against my face. It feels so nice, so perfect, so... right. I lean in to unite our lips, the craving of hers against mine being almost unbearable._

* * *

I wake up to my blankets being torn off of me, causing me to let out an annoyed groan. I open my eyes and see a pissed off looking Lilly at the end of my bed with her arms crossed.

"Get up rich girl, don't expect any special treatment here." She says, giving me a cruel glare. In return I let out a soft sigh of frustration.

"Lilly.... When are you going to realize I'm just like everybody else here? Why do you have to treat me like shit?" I say angrily, sitting up and rubbing my eyes. In return, I get a disgusted scoff from the blond at the end of my bed.

"Oh honey, don't flatter yourself. It's because you're just like all of the other bitches in here that I treat you like shit. Like I said, nobody gets a special treatment." She says, walking over to her dresser, searching for something in her drawers. Her statement not only confuses me, but doesn't make much sense seeing as she hasn't given me a chance to even know that. I decide to give in to her little game, and fight back.

"What, not like Sarah?" I ask, trying to get my point across. This causes her to stop in her tracks and stand completely still for a moment. She then turns around and walks dangerously fast towards my bed.

"How do you know about Sarah!?" She asks, giving me a confused yet cold stare.

"I know enough to say that you gave her a special treatment, why can't you do the same for me? At least try to get to know me before you judge me. You never know, I could turn out to be just like her." I say, calming down a bit, hoping she'll hear me out.

"Don't _even_ compare yourself to Sarah! You're _nothing_ like her!" She says, giving me a dirty look.

"Oh, really? This coming from the girl who's afraid to get to know me?" I ask, smiling evilly and raising a daring eyebrow.

"I'm not afraid of anything, you need to get that through your head." She says, crossing her arms.

"Fine, prove it. Get to know me." I say simply, standing up and crossing my arms, mimicking her.

"I'd rather not waste my time, I have better things to do."

"Wow Lilly, look around you! You're in a fucking mental hospital, you have no friends, _nothing_. I'm pretty sure you have enough time to drop this bitch act of yours and try to be nice for once." I say, returning her look of disgust.

"I don't know what you mean by this little "act" of mine, but trust me, I'd rather be bored out of my fucking mind than waste my time on someone like you." She says, making quotes with her fingers to emphasize that she had no idea what I meant when I said she was putting on an act.

"So, in other words you're scared." I say, smiling.

"Like I said, I'm not scared of anything. Especially not some stuck up rich girl like you. You're a complete waste of human skin." She says, rolling her eyes. What she says makes my blood boil. I hate how stubborn, and quick to judge she is.

"Oh, is that so? So you're not just putting up a mean girl front so we'll stay away from you? You're not just scared of losing anybody and being too vulnerable? Do you mean to tell me that the reason you don't get too close to us isn't because you know deep down that we all have to leave eventually, but you're so screwed up that you'll never get out of here? Huh?.... Well!? What's wrong Lilly? Cat got your tongue?! Are you too scared to answer? Wow, not so tough now are you?" I say angrily, knowing full well that what I said was the complete truth. After all, I heard it come right out of her mouth.

"Wha.... Huh.... You.... I... NO! Not at all.... I just don't associate myself with sad little suicide cases like yourself!" She says angrily, stomping out of the room and slamming the door behind her.

"Ouch." I say as a small giggle escapes my lips. I knew she only went that far because she was ashamed. She knew I was right. And I was right. I plan on doing whatever it takes to break that girl. There's no way I can deal for three months if she's going to keep acting that way... Or was it something else? Was there another reason I wanted to get to know the real Lilly? I sit back down on my bed, completely confused. I suddenly remembered the dream I had before I was so rudely interrupted. 

_Why would I be dreaming about Lilly? Why the hell was I with her instead of my boyfriend? Why the hell..... did I enjoy her being there instead of my boyfriend?_ Feeling completely confused about my dream, I fall backwards against my bed and let out a frustrated groan. _I don't even like girls, I've never really thought about them that way, so why would I be dreaming about one, and such a mean one? I mean, yeah.. I guess I've had a couple thoughts about girls, but nothing so intense. I've never dreamt of one before. If I had to dream about a girl, why did it have to be such a bitch like Lilly? And why..... did I enjoy it? I mean yeah, she's cute... Scratch that, gorgeous. And maybe she's a little sexy when she's angry. And adorable when she gets caught in a lie and babbles like an idiot. And the way she bites her bottom lip when she's nervous... Oh god Miley! What are you thinking!? Sweet Niblets, get a hold of yourself! You can't feel this way about a girl, especially not Lilly. _I get up off of my bed, and decide I need to go eat something. Desperately trying to shake off my confusing thoughts, I rush to my door needing to get a bit of fresh air. Well, not really fresh air, but I just needed to get the hell out of there. Maybe eating something will help, or at least take my mind off of it.

As soon as I open my door, I bump into Mikayla causing us both to stumble backwards a bit.

"Woah, I'm so sorry Mikay." I say, checking to make sure she's ok.

"It's all good. Hey, why is Lilly so pissed off? Did you notice any odd behavior?" She asks curiously.

"Lilly? Pissed off? Noooo." I say sarcastically, following Mikayla to the cafeteria. "When isn't that girls behavior odd?" I say, both of us now laughing as I follow her to a table with two other girls. Mikayla finally stops laughing and lets out a sigh.

"Anyways, Amber, Ashley, this is Miley. Miley, Amber and Ashley." She says, pulling out my chair for me. I offer her a thankful smile and sit down, with her taking the seat next to me.

"Hi..." I say shyly, not completely used to people not knowing me, feeling a bit anxious about the unfamiliar situation.

"So you're the sociopath's new roomie huh? Kudos on whatever you said to piss her off." Amber says to me, offering me her hand. I offer her a welcoming smile and shake her hand.

"Wait... Socio-what? What's that?" I ask curiously, taking a bite of the sandwich Mikayla had brought me.

You know.. Sociopath? Crazy antisocial bitches, show no remorse for their actions, don't care about other peoples feelings, incapability to care about others or form friendships or relationships..." Amber explains, looking over at Lilly in disgust.

"Oh.." I say, a bit upset about the new information. _That can't be true, she showed a deep emotional side that night in Mrs. McGee's office. Not to mention, she was really good friends with this Sarah girl, and still really cares about her. It's probably just another act. There's got to be something else, something she doesn't want anybody to know, but what?_ A hand waving in front of my face brings me out of my thoughts and back to reality.

"Miley?" I hear Mikayla say, looking a bit concerned.

"Huh? Oh, sorry... Anyways, what are you two in for?" I ask curiously, trying to make conversation.

"Well, Ashley here has an eating disorder, hence why she has a full plate of food in front of her that she'll probably just take a bite of and throw out, and why she keeps such a flawless figure." Amber says, giving Ashley a smirk, which Ashely replies by rolling her eyes. I too roll my eyes at this, not exactly amused at how Amber won't even let Ashley talk for herself.

"Oh stop it Amber, I'm fucking huge!" She says, looking upset and running out of the cafeteria.

"Annnnd point made." Amber says, resulting in laughter between her and Mikayla. I once again roll my eyes at their obnoxious behavior and look back to see if Ashley's ok, but she's gone. I honestly can't stand girls like them. That girl Ashley obviously has a serious problem that isn't a matter of joking. I hate how they have to tear others down to feel good about themselves. Part of me desperately wants to just give in and laugh, so I can have at least two friends while I'm stuck in here. The other, more sensible part of me tells me to walk away. I've been pretending to be somebody I'm not to get friends for too long. That part of life is behind me. Suddenly having no appetite do to the sick behavior of Amber and Mikayla, I push my tray away and excuse myself from the table of bitches, trying desperately to leave that part of me in the past. Feeling completely depressed from the memories and constant reminders of all the reasons I tried to kill myself, I wander down the hallway and find myself at the art room. As soon as I enter the room, my eyes land on the guitar, causing me to smile lightly. I walk over to the seat by the window and sit down, guitar in hand.

"You're so stupid Miley.. You always manage to get mixed up in the wrong crowd. If those bitches want to sit around and laugh at others to make themselves feel better, then good for them, that part of me is in the past. I'm done with that bullshit. No longer will I care about what other people think of me. The only person who's opinion matters is me." I say to myself, letting out a gentle sigh as a teardrop rolls down my cheek at the memories of my past.

I look out the window, and observe the outside world. The hospital overlooks the beach. It's like they're taunting us by showing us what we can't have. I stare out the window for a while, watching the familiar places that I won't be seeing for another three months. Seeing all the familiar faces and happy people enjoying their lives causes a few more teardrops roll down my cheeks. I close my eyes and lean back against the wall behind me, letting out a soft sigh. In hopes of cheering myself up, I grab the guitar. I start off by gently strumming a quick chord. _perfect_

I let out a relieved sigh and smile at the sound of the guitar. The only thing that could ever calm my nerves was music. It relaxes me in a way that's indescribable. Lately I've been too busy to even give in to the pleasures of the simple things in life. Feeling relaxed and completely content, I begin to play a song that I wrote a month before I attempted suicide when my life began to go down the drain. I let out a slow, shaky breath and begin to sing quietly.

_Wake up here I go_

_Cram it all down my throat_

_Stomach so full that I wish I could choke_

_7 am my heads already in a spin_

_As soon as I'm out that door_

_Bam it hits me like a ton of those red bricks_

_Can't dig myself outta this highest ditch_

_This madness_

I begin to lose myself in the song and start strumming harder and singing louder.

_I swear sometimes_

_I can't tell which ways up_

_Which ways down_

_It's all up in my face, need to push it away_

_Somebody push it away_

_So all that I can hear_

_Is a simple song_

_Sing along now_

_La la la la la_

_La la la la_

_La la la la la_

_La la la la_

_Mid day sun beating on the concrete_

_Burning up my feet_

_Too many cars on the street_

_The noise, the red, the green_

_Makes me wanna scream_

_5 o'clock now it's bumper on, bumper on_

_Bumper horns honkin _

_Nobody's lookin but everybody's talkin_

_Just another day_

_On this highway_

_I swear sometimes _

_I can't tell which ways up_

_Which ways down_

_It's all up in my face_

_Need to push it away_

_Somebody push it away_

_'_

_Cus all I wanna hear_

_Ohh_

_Is a simple song_

_Mmm_

_Sing along now_

_La la la la la_

_la la la la_

_La la la la la_

_La da da la_

I stand up and put all my emotions into the song. Tears begin to run down my cheeks as I remember my inspiration for the song. I begin strumming harder and singing louder than before.

_Hey!_

_Sing along now_

_Sing along!_

_What I'd give_

_To turn it off_

_And make it stop!_

_Make it stop!_

_You gotta make it stop.._

I drop to the floor and strum gently, now singing quietly as the tears begin to flow more rapidly.

_So all that I can hear_

_Is a simple song_

_Mmm sing along now _

_La la la la la_

_La la la la_

_La la la la la_

_La da da la_

_La da da la la_

_La da da la_

_La da da la la_

_La da da da_

I stand up and sit the guitar back down, wiping my tears away. I let out a soft sigh and notice the sound of soft sniffling behind me. I turn around in attempts to find the source of the gentle crying but see a door swining, I was too late. I run over to try to catch up to the person, but stop dead in my tracks when I see something on the ground by the doorway. I squat down and pick up the object. It's a lockette. I examine it closer and find writing inside the heart shaped lockette.

_L.T._

"Lilly?" I ask to myself softly, unbelieving about my own assumptions. I stand up and open the door, running into the hallway trying desperately to find her. I find myself looking down an empty hallway, nobody in sight. I let out a defeated sigh and place the necklace in my pocket.

* * *

**I don't own anything.**

**The song is "Simple Song" By Miley Cyrus. I love it, it's my favorite song. :]**

**Sorry if the lyrics are wrong. I wrote them by down memory, so if they're wrong then I've been singing the wrong lyrics for a while.. lol. **

**R&R ppl :P**


	4. Forbidden territory

**I don't own anything.**

* * *

I'm wandering down the halls completely confused. This girl is full of mystery. It's driving me crazy. She wants everybody to think she's this bitchy sociopath, but I know she's not. I can tell there's something else under that cover story. Something beautiful. _Woah, Miley, beautiful? _Let me rephrase that, something... interesting. I can tell she's more than this bitch that everybody sees her as. There's something deeper than anger within her. There's compassion, and a lot of it, so why the hell does she want us all to think otherwise? Why is she hiding such a beautiful emotion with such an ugly facade. There's a piece to the story missing, and I've got to find it. She's been through a lot. I can tell. I know what it's like to lose somebody. I know how bad it hurts, and how sometimes you just want to push people away and avoid all the pain. It's easier to avoid the emotions, no matter how beautiful they can be at an ultimate high in order to avoid them at a low. Sometimes you feel like it's just not worth being vulnerable. I've been there, I know exactly what she's going through. I've got to find a way to break this girl. Get beneath the facade and find the real Lilly Truscott. The one that was in Mrs. McGee's office. The emotional caring person, who's capable of friendship, capable of love. Ughhh, I can't stand it. Why am I so obsessed about this? Normally, when a girl treats me like this I just walk away. Nobody has the right to treat people that way without any regards towards their feelings. It really irks me. It's one of my biggest pet peeves. I can't stand it when people judge others when they don't even know them. Why is she this big exception? I don't understand it. There's something about her that's so invigorating. She's so mysterious, it draws me in like flies to a bug zapper. Why though? I need to find some answers. I hardly understand my feelings right now. However, I can figure those out later. I need to figure her out immediately. It's driving me crazy. There's something more than what she wants us to believe. I'm not falling for her little act. I have to get to the bottom of this.

I finally arrive at my room, not wanting to go in. I lean against the door and slide down to the floor, letting out a frustrated sigh. After a few seconds I hear quiet mumbling from inside the room. Desperate to know the reason, I press my ear against the door.

"Stupid Lilly, stupid Miley and her stupid gorgeous voice." _gorgeous? _I think to myself, now smiling ear to ear.

"You just had to go in there didn't you? You could have walked away but noooo. She might as well be a freakin siren, I just couldn't turn away.... Great job Lilly. Now you can't go back to get your necklace. Ughhh, why am I so _stupid_!?" I decide now would be the perfect time to interrupt. The best way to break her down is to catch her in a lie. I've found that out first hand.

"Scientists say being a complete bitch for long periods at a time takes a lot of energy, burns a lot of braincells." I say, plopping down on the bed, trying to hide my smile, biting my bottom lip in a desperate attempt not to laugh.

"Miley... I didn't know you were here.." She says quietly, in an almost whisper.

"Looking for something?" I ask the blond on her hands and knees.

"No... why would I be.. I mean, I didn't lose anything. I don't even have things. Nope... don't even like jewelry. Where on earth did you hear such a thing?" She says, her cheeks a bright red.

"Umm, Lil... I never said you did." I say, raising my eyebrow, though on the inside I'm bursting in laughter.

"Yeah... I know.. don't call me that." She says simply, not even looking up at me, just continuing to search the floor.

"Whatever _Lil." _I say, now unable to hide my smile.

"I said.. Don't... call me that." She says, looking up with an evil stare. This causes my smile to grow even wider.

"Oh, well why on earth not _LIL_? Does it bother ya _LIL_?" I say, raising my eyebrow and grinning down at her.

"Why don't you let me show you how it makes me feel!!" She says, jumping off of the floor and flying towards me, tackling me on my bed. She grabs onto my arms, flipping me over so she has them behind my back. She pulls me off of the bed and slams my back into the wall forcefully, gripping tightly onto my shirt. Despite the pain of the impact, I keep going. I know she's not mean, I know this isn't her, I know there's something more than anger in her.

"Well _LIL_ are you going to show me yet?" I say, testing how far she'll go. Hoping to prove everybody wrong. She tightens her grip on my shirt and shoves me harder into the wall. I try to shake off the pain, not wanting her to know it effected me.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She says through clenched teeth.

"Why not _LIL_? Did somebody call you that? Does it remind you of something? Does the so called sociopath actually have feelings?" I say fakely, knowing that when she gets caught in a lie, it throws her off.

"N... No.. You just have no right to call me that. You don't know me, I never even gave you permission to call me Lilly." She says, seeming to have calmed down a bit, but still trying to act tough.

"I think that's it. Sarah called you that didn't she _LIL_?" I say, smiling with a raised eyebrow.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She screams, only this time, it wasn't a facade. There was pure anger in her eyes. Her grip on my shirt was replaced with a firm grip on my neck.

"Lilly... I... cant....br..." I try to say, but the last word doesn't seem to come out. Her grip was tightening so much that I couldn't breath. I began to feel extremely lightheaded.

"What's that _MILES _do you like that? Huh? I think I heard you say you wanted me to squeeze tighter?" She says, mocking the way I was speaking to her. I don't do anything. I desperately struggle to get her hands off of me, but she's too strong. I look in her eyes and see a feeling of hurt. I went too far. I need to do something to stop her, but her grip keeps tightening. My vision begins to blur from lack of air. I have to do something.. anything...

I do the only thing I can think of that will shock her enough, so I can at least try to get out of her grip. I take my hands off of her wrists and wrap them around her head, pulling her face in towards mine. I lean in and forcefully press my lips against hers, hoping to have an effect on her. The moment her lips touch mine a heat wave jolts through my body. Every limb goes numb at the feeling of her warm, soft lips against mine. The feeling of our lips touching makes me week in the knees. I pull away to see a mind blowing sight. She's no longer trying to hurt me, her arms are wrapped around my neck gently. When I look up at her, her eyes are closed, and her lips are still pursed as if she's waiting for more. I don't understand what just happened. What I'm feeling, why she reacted the way she did. The only thing that makes sense right now is those lips on mine. It felt right. I want so badly to reunite our lips, but I can't even begin to comprehend what this would mean. I can't hold back any longer. I give in to temptations and lean in to reunite our lips and feel that amazing numbness fill my body. Suddenly, her eyes open slowly, stopping me in my tracks.

"Wha... I.... That..." She shakes her head as if she doesn't believe something. She looks so confused. Oh how I wish I could make that face go away, make things right. Why the hell am I feeling this way? I've got to stop, got to end this. I need to get the hell out of here before my temptations give in and I do it again. Only this time, I'd go further, further than my own liking. I need to stop this before it goes too far. Before I can leave the room, Lilly gives me the weirdest look. She shakes her head at me with that same look of confusion. I go to say something, but can't speak, can't move, can't even comprehend what just happened. Right when I go to say something she runs out of the room. _What the fuck did I just do...?_

I can't even understand the reaction I got to that kiss. I can't understand the reaction she gave me, or my own reaction to the kiss itself. I don't even know where to begin to try and comprehend what is happening right now. Did I just kiss Lilly? What was with that look on her face? Why did she let go? Why didn't she stop me? Why did she run out like that? It's like a first kiss all over again. Just like my first kiss with a boy, total confusion. This is an unknown territory for me, it's forbidden, I can't... So why... why do I want so badly to trespass?

* * *

**Short and sweet. :] Lol, that got pretty intense. I don't know where that came from. I had this chapter totally mapped out, but something told me to take it a different way. Hope it wasn't bad or anything. I was going to hold off on the Liley. I kind of sped it up a bit, but as you can see it will still take a while. I just love leaving you guys hanging like that. :] R&R ppl :P**


	5. OK, so maybe I like her

**Sorry about the wait, been busy with homework. Hope you like the chapter. I'm extremely tired, and didn't feel like being as descriptive as I usually am. I can barely keep my eyes open, but I really wanted to get this chapter up. I know it's like extremely crappy, but I hope it was worth the wait. But then again, it probably isn't.. haha, I can't even think right now I'm so tired. Anyways, R&R ppl :P  
**

* * *

_I stand there, mouth agape, unable to move. Why didn't she stop me? Push me away? Scream at me? Why did she just stand there? And why the fuck did she let go of her my neck and drape her arms on my shoulders like that? What was that about? She was just shocked.. Yeah, that's it. And so was I.. I didn't really want to kiss her again. I just wanted to get her off of me.. right?_

"Ughhh!!" I scream in frustration and slide down against the wall. I can't even begin to comprehend what just happened, and why we both reacted how we did. Why I felt something when I kissed her.. what I felt when I kissed her. I've never really thought about girls before, so what makes right now different? And why Lilly? I mean, I can't stand the girl. She's so fake. She acts like this big tough bitch, but on the inside... On the inside... there's something different. Sweeter... more.... beautiful...

I press my hands against my face, letting out another frustrated grunt. _I've gotta stop these feelings. It's just confusion from the kiss. I don't even like girls, especially not Lilly. I'm just... intrigued by her. I'm just curious what exactly it is that she's hiding. It's not like I like her and want to get to know her.. Psh, that's definitely not it... Or is it?... Miley! Stop it.. No... you __**don't**__ like girls! You __**can't**__!... but Lilly.. Oh Lilly.. She's not just any girl.. She's.. different. There's something about her. No! Miley.. No! Stop it! _

I get up off of the wall and walk over to my bed falling back and letting out a defeated sigh. I climb under my blankets and get my much needed rest. After practically being strangled to death, and all these confusing thoughts about Lilly, I feel completely drained. I keep trying to convince myself that I'm merely intrigued by the girl, and not attracted to her. After several failed attempts I let out another frustrated sigh and drift off into sleep, the last thought on my mind being Lilly.

* * *

"Miley.. Miley.. Wake up." I open my eyes slowly and see Lilly hovering over me, shoving my arm.

"Hmm.. Yeah?" I ask, confused. Looking up at her while blocking the light shining in through the window with my hand.

"You can't sleep in.. You have a meeting with Mrs. McGee in 20.." She says simply, going back over to her bed and picking up a book.

"Oh.. Yeah.. I forgot about that.. So what exactly goes down in these meetings?" I ask curiously, hoping for some insight since I wasn't too familiar with the place.

"Umm, don't care, reading." She says, not even looking up from her book. I let out a defeated sigh and head over to my dresser looking for some clean clothes.

"Any idea where Mikayla is? I need to shower." I say, not looking over at her, trying my hardest to play her little game and act like I didn't care, but the fact was I did care, and it hurt. I just wanted her to finally open up and talk to me, stop with her little act.

"Hmm? Oh, she left.. Did you not catch the part where I said I was reading and to leave me the fuck alone?" She says. I turn around to see that she had finally looked up from the book and was giving me an icy glare.

"Wait, what? She left? Like.. the institution.. or...?" I ask, confused, ignoring the dirty look.

"No, mars.. Yes the fucking institution!" She says, rolling her eyes and continuing to read her book.

"Well.. I kinda need to take a shower.. Am I allowed to go alone?" I ask curiously

"No, go find Patty, she'll take you." She says simply, not looking up at me. I simply roll my eyes and sigh.

"Are you fucking kidding me? That lady gives me the creeps.. Can't you just take me?" I ask, giving her a pleading look, truly hating the idea of that creepy lady watching me shower.

"Umm, hello? Reading here, kinda don't give a shit what you think of Patty." She says, still not looking up at me.

I let out a sigh, and decide to retort to blackmail. "Even if there's something in it for you?" I ask, raising an eyebrow as she looks up.

"There's really nothing that could make me do a favor for you. Get over it, go find Patty." She says laughing, continuing to read her book.

"Oh really... Nothing? Not even... this?" I ask, smirking and pulling the necklace out of my pocket slowly.

"You.. I.." She clears her throat, looking away nervously. "I.. umm dropped that the other day.. When I was in the art room.. alone.. Not yesterday.. Like a few days ago.. Before you were even here." She says, blushing and trying to hide her face. I simply smile at her bad attempt of a cover story and continue with my little scheme.

"Hmm, so I suppose it was just Patty in that room crying yesterday?" I smirk down at the obviously effected Lilly.

"Fine! Come on! Let's go!" She says, jumping up and gripping my elbow tightly, dragging me towards the bathroom. Despite the pain that her firm grip caused on my elbow, I couldn't help but smile, knowing full well I had won the little fight.

* * *

I get out of the shower, and look through the curtain at Lilly. She's sitting there, playing with her hands awkwardly. Ever since I kinda told her I heard her crying, she hasn't said a word. Even when I'd try to talk, she'd cut me off and tell me to just shut up and hurry up with my shower. I look out at her and smile, concocting a little plan.

"Hey Lilly, mind handing me that towel?" I ask, trying not to smile.

"You have hands don't you?" She says, looking away.

"Yes, the hands that I'll be using to cover myself if I have to come out there naked to grab it. Can't you just hand it to me? You're right there." I say, motioning towards the towel with my hand.

"Fine, whatever." She says, letting out a defeated sigh and throwing the towel towards me. Unknowing that she was going to throw the towel I drop it, smiling to myself at how she had just helped me out with my little plan. I push the curtain aside slightly, bending over to pick up the towel. I look up slightly to see Lilly's wandering eyes on my chest. She soon notices that I'm looking back at her, and turns away quickly, clearing her throat. I let out a quiet laugh and go back behind the curtain.

"Hey Lil, hand me my clothes?" I say, purposely using the nickname she despises.

"I said _don't_ call me tha...." She says through gritted teeth as I walk through the curtain completely naked, using the towel she had handed me to dry my hair.

"What's wrong Lil? Cat got your tongue?" I say, offering her a small laugh and a confused smile.

"Miley.. I warned you.." She says, starting to stand up defensively, but she stops in her tracks at my next movement. I bend over her to reach for my clothes sitting next to her on the bench. As I pull away, I feel my breast slightly brush against her arm due to how close we were.

"Warned me about what?" I say, giving her a clueless look. She doesn't reply, simply sits there with her mouth hanging open.

"I...I... about..." She says, looking away nervously, barely able to form words.

"I.. I.. I.. I what Lil?" I ask, raising my eyebrow and giving her an even more confused look as I slowly pull my panties up over my knees and into place. I look up to biting her bottom lip and looking at me with glossy eyes as if she's in a daze.

"I... I told you not to call me that.." She says, looking away quickly, shaking her head like she did the night before.

"Oh.. sorry.. Hey Lilly, could you help me with this?" I say, pretending to need help hooking my bra in the back.

"Umm... sure..." She says, simply, hesitating to get up at first.

"Thanks.." I say simply, smiling a bit as I feel her hands trembling on my back while she tries to hook them.

"Uh huh... n.. no problem.." She says, stuttering nervously as she finally manages to hook my bra. I feel her hands lingering a bit on my back and can't help but smile, but decide to clear my throat to make her feel even more nervous.

"Umm.. You better hurry.. That meeting is pretty soon.. Don't want to keep her waiting." She says, not looking at me as she places her hands in her pockets and laughs nervously.

"Ok, sure.. Can you go tell her what's up and that I might be a bit late?" I say while pulling my shirt down over my stomach.

"Yeah.. sure." She says, starting to turn around.

"Lilly, hold up.." I say, moving closer to her.

"Yeah?" She says, turning back around and then taking a step backwards at noticing our proximity. I move in a bit closer, moving my hand slowly to the back of her head, sliding my hand through her hair. Her breathing begins to speed up and she swallows hard as if there was a rock stuck in her throat. I smile a bit, noticing how nervous she was becoming. I slowly bring my hand back, grazing her cheek gently before returning it to my side and stepping back.

"You had something in your hair." I say simply, giving her a friendly smile. She doesn't say anything, just stands there, her mouth agape, her breathing quickening. I give her a confused look, and move closer placing my hand on her forehead. The feeling of her warm breath hitting my wrist as I placed my hand there sending chills up my arm. I suddenly feel my heart rate begin to speed up, and look down at Lilly. Her eyes, meeting mine, a look of tranquility on her face. No anger, frustration, nothing. I smile down at her, noting the extremely captivating blue eyes that I hadn't noticed before.

"Lil, you ok?" I ask, giving her a concerned look. She didn't answer, just looked up at my eyes and then back down to my lips. Her eyes begin to gloss over, and her mouth opens slightly. She leans in a bit, biting her lip, our faces becoming only inches apart. I swallow hard and let out a small yelp. Her breath against my face sending chills down my spine, and unknown feelings in my stomach. Suddenly, I realize that my plan was beginning to backfire, and had effected me too. I pull away quickly, trying to break the awkward silence.

"Lilly... You ok?" I ask again, after clearing my throat and rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly.

"Huh? yeah.. fine.. thanks...." She says, shaking her head as if to break herself from the trance she had fallen in. I smile a little at the dazed and confused look on her face, and can't help but smile even wider thinking about what had almost happened.

"Lil.. You uh.. might wanna go tell her now.." I say, awkwardly, hiding the red tint of my cheeks that hadn't left since I felt her warm breath against my face while looking into her captivating eyes.

"Oh...Yeah.." She says, rushing out of the room awkwardly. The smile on my face grows wider as I realize that she didn't stop me from calling her Lil and actually said thank you.. well.. thanks. I knew there was more than what she wanted us all to believe. I sit down against the bench and let out a sigh, replaying the moment in my mind. Upon thinking about how her breath felt against my face, her fierce blue eyes, and the weird feeling in my stomach that I hadn't recognized, my smile grew even wider. I couldn't help but enjoy the feeling she gave me, the effect I had on her, and the effect she had on me. _Ok, so maybe I like her._ I finally admit to myself, letting out a small laugh as I stand up and grab my things, rushing out of the bathroom and towards Mrs. McGee's Office. On my way there, the smile never left my face and the thoughts of Lilly never left my mind.

* * *

I open the door to Mrs. McGee's office and plop down on the chair in front of her desk, not even looking up at her. I let out a soft sigh, still thinking about what had just happened in the bathroom. I look up a bit, and examine the sight before me. My eyes stop at a picture on her desk of Lilly. I find myself looking at her blue eyes and smiling even wider, blushing as I remember how much more beautiful they were staring up into mine. I bite on my bottom lip, while getting lost in my thoughts of the situation in the bathroom.

My thoughts are interrupted with the sound of laughing coming from the figure behind the desk. I look up and shoot her a look of confusion.

"What?" I say, still smiling. She doesn't say anything, just shakes her head and continues to laugh as she goes through papers on her desk.

"What!?" I say again, completely confused.

"Nothing.. It's just.. Lilly had the same look on her face just a second ago." She says, shaking her head and now erupting in laughter. Despite the fact that I was being laughed at, I couldn't help but smile. Apparently I had quite an effect on Lilly. I felt a feeling of satisfaction knowing that my plan was working. I was slowly, but surly starting to break that girl. Though it wasn't really a big deal, I know that if I keep up what I'm doing, I'll have her cracked in no time. It's only a matter of time before that girl opens up, and I'm willing to wait. I've got to know what she's hiding. Got to know what more there is to this mysterious girl. I've got to have more. I can't explain it. There's just something about this girl that makes my stomach tie in knots when she's near me. I feel week in the knees, and can't help but smile. I don't know what it is about her, I don't know what the fuck these weird feelings are, but I like them, and I definitely want more. Ok, so yeah my plan backfired a little, but hey, I'm not complaining.

* * *

**Soooo, how'd you like it?? R&R :]**


	6. Green eyed monster

**I don't own anything**

* * *

I'm pretty much over my little infatuation with Lilly. Yeah, so maybe she's not a sociopath, but she's a total bitch. I've been trying all week to crack this girl and what do I get? Nothing, nothing at all. Ever since that little bathroom incident, she's totally closed up and put her gaurd up even more, as if it was even possible. Half the time she's ignoring me, and the other half of the time it's all short replies full of sarcasm and a snotty attitude ending with her stomping out of the room leaving me confused, annoyed, and pissed off. I'm sick and tired of it. Yeah she's cute, gorgeous, sexy, and she's been on my mind 24/7, but I can't deal with her drama anymore. It's not worth trying when she's just going to be a bitch in return. I guess I'll just have to try and get over that weak in the knees feeling I get when she's around. It's not going to be easy, but I can live without it. At first it was a feeling that I wasn't going to give up without a fight, but I've been fighting all week and haven't gotten anything in return.

I'm heading down the hall on my way to yet another boring group session, and see Amber yelling in Ashley's face. As usual, Ashley is just standing there taking it. I sigh, and continue walking down the hall, trying to avoid the drama.

"Yeah, well what are you going to do about it? Probably head straight to the bathroom and do what you do best, puke all your troubles away." I hear Amber yelling from behind my back. At hearing this, my blood begins to boil. I let out a defeated sigh and decide to get involved. I stop dead in my tracks, turning around and getting in Amber's face.

"Hey, why don't you go find something better to do rather than tearing others down. Like maybe do something about that face, because as of right now, that's my only problem. So maybe if you would take your ugly face elsewhere, Ashley wouldn't have any problems!" I say crossing my arms and shooting her an icy glare.

"Oh really Stewart? The suicide case has something to say does she??" Amber says, taking a threatening step closer, crossing her own arms.

"Is that all you got? It's pretty obvious I've got problems. Look around you, you're in a fucking mental hospital. Face it Amber, you're in an institution, and you've only got one friend who probably won't be around much longer with the way you're treating her. Oh, and you might want to look in the mirror. You've got a few extra pounds on ya that you might want to look into getting rid of. So you're not one to talk about weight." I say, stepping closer to her waiting for her to make a move.

"You'll regret that Stewart." She says through clenched teeth.

"Girls, break it up and get inside!" Mrs. Williams yells through the door nearby.

"You got lucky Stewart, next time she won't be here." Amber says while walking away, purposely bumping into me.

"Oh, I'm shaking in my boots." I say sarcastically, flashing Ashley a quick sympathetic smile before following them into the room.

* * *

I've been sitting in group for about 45 minutes. All of which have been extremely boring. I keep catching myself zoning out and staring at Lilly. I try to snap out of it and tell myself it's not worth it.

"Well, sometimes I look in the mirror... And.... I just... I just see this giant blob..." I look over to see Ashley who was now crying. I lean forward in my chair, resting my elbows on my knees and leaning into my palms. I can't help but feel sympathy for the girl. I mean, she's got this flawless body. She's gorgeous, sweet, cute, loyal, she's anything but a giant blob.

"And.... and...." She stops a minute to wipe her tears and try to steady her breathing.

"It's ok, take your time..." Mrs. Williams says, flashing her an encouraging smile. Ashley lets out a shaky sigh and continues.

"And... Sometime... I feel like nobody could ever want me... Could ever love me. I just... I feel like I have nothing to offer.." She says, letting out quiet sobs while wiping her eyes.

"Got that right." Amber mumbles. I let out a disgusted scoff, and give Amber a dirty look. I look over to Lilly who's rolling her eyes, but my gaze averts over to Ashley instead. I can't help but feel sympathetic at seeing how sad she looks. She looks so vulnerable, so helpless.

"Amber! That's enough! You can leave now." Mrs. Williams says, pointing to the door. Amber lets out a scoff and crosses her arms, remaining in her seat.

"Now!" She says again, appearing more angry.

"Whatever, this is stupid." She says, walking out of the room.

"Alright, thank you for sharing that with us Ashley. That's all for today. See you all in a week." Mrs. Williams says, leaving the room. I stand up quickly, rushing after Ashley who had left the room in such a hurry. I can't explain why I felt like I had to catch up with her, but before I could object, my feet were doing all the work and I was running after her.

"Whoa, Ash, wait up!" I call, running up to her and grabbing her arm. She turns around quickly giving me a confused look.

"You know... That was really brave what you did in there. I definitely couldn't have done that." I say, smiling at her, not letting go of her arm and rubbing it up and down comfortingly. She looks down at my hand and raises her eyebrow, but then looks up at me.

"Yeah... I forgot to thank you for earlier.. That took some guts. I could never stand up to Amber like that." She says, moving closer and flashing me a gorgeous smile. I suddenly feel extremely nervous and can't seem to stop staring at her gorgeous brown eyes. I begin to feel week in the knees, and can't seem to find the strength so say anything.

"Yeah, it was nothing..." I say, clearing my throat and taking a step back, desperately trying to end the awkwardness and weird feelings in the pit of my stomach.

"No, it was more than nothing. You don't know how long I've been putting up with Amber, I can't thank you enough." She says, grabbing my hand and taking a step closer, pulling me into a hug. I quickly sink into the hug, feeling lightheaded at the simplest touch from this gorgeous girl. I wrap my arms around her, not wanting to let go. Finally, the hug that seemed like forever ended with an annoying yet familiar voice.

"Get a room freaks." Amber says, giving me a disgusted look. I pull out of the hug and give Ashley an apologetic look for my lingering hands, but she just smiles up at me.

"Well!? Are you coming or not?" She says to Ashley impatiently.

"I better go." She says softly, only a few inches away from my face.

"I understand.. If you ever want a real friend, I'm here." I say, returning the smile, and looking down at her lips longingly. I look up to meet her gaze and she seems to be doing the same thing. I feel her breath on my face becoming faster, and she's looking at me with the same longing look in her eyes. She bites down on her bottom lip and moves in a little, lessening the space between us.

"What was that Stewart?" Amber says rudely, causing both me and Ashley to look up. Ashley takes a step back, clearing her throat and rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly. I suddenly become pissed at Amber for interrupting my moment with Ashley.

"I said, if Ashley were to decide to make a smart decision, I'd gladly show her what a real friend is!" I say, walking up to Amber and crossing my arms.

"Oh and you think she'd actually leave me for you. Looks like you're even more delusional than I thought. Come on Ashley." She says, walking away. Instead of following her, Ashley just stands there staring at the ground. I smile a bit at this, hoping she'll just stand up to Amber.

"Ashley!" She screams, and of course, Ashley follows, giving me an apologetic look before running after Amber down the hall. I feel a bit sad by this, but know that it was her decision and I couldn't do anything about it. I let out a sigh, and walk in the opposite direction towards my room.

* * *

I rush into the room, flopping down on my bed and letting out a frustrated sigh.

"What's wrong?" I hear Lilly say from her bed, but I don't bother to look up.

"Like you care." I say bitterly.

"Well excuse me for trying to be nice." She says, letting out a scoff.

"Nice? You don't even know what nice is." I say, sitting up and giving her a look of disbelief.

"What's your problem?" She says rudely, returning her attention to her book.

"What's my problem? My problem is my so called roommate who treats me like shit 24/7! Why do you have to be such a bitch!?" I scream, losing all control due to my anger.

"Oh, just shut up. You're lucky I even associate myself with a sad little suicide case like yourself." She says, not looking up from her book. My blood begins to boil from her words, and I stand up, not able to hold back anymore.

"Shut the hell up!" I say, walking over and ripping the book out of her hands and throwing it across the room, resulting in her slapping me in the face. I place my hand on my face where she had hit me and look at her in disbelief. I don't know what it was, I don't know why, but I just couldn't hold back. I throw myself at her, wrapping my arms around her and forcing my lips onto hers. She wasn't replying the kiss, but I couldn't seem to pull away. I missed the contact. I've been daydreaming about the feeling of her lips on mine for so long. I pull away, sucking on her bottom lip, lingering a bit. Right when I go to pull away, she wraps her arms around my waist and pull me down onto her as she lies back in her bed. I hungrily reunite our lips, giving each lip equal attention, feeling as if I can't get enough of the taste. I slide my tongue against her bottom lip, practically pleading for the access. She soon grants it, and slams her tongue against mine, sending a wave of arousal throughout my body. I slide my hands through her hair, landing on the back of her head, pulling her into the kiss. She happily continues kissing me, and bites down on my bottom lip, causing me to moan. I subconsciously grind down on her, not being able to control my lust. I pull away for breath, looking down at the panting beauty beneath me. The feeling of her chest moving up and down against me as she gasps for air causes another wave of arousal and I move in, longing for her lips against mine once more. I slowly move down to kiss her again, but she opens her eyes and turns away and my kiss lands on her cheek. I pull away a bit, giving her a confused look, but she has an unreadable expression on her face. I go to say something, but she interrupts me and shoves me off of her.

"What?" I say, giving her a confused look as she sits up and places her face in her hands, looking frustrated.

"What the hell was that?!" She asks angrily, finally looking up at me.

"That was called a kiss.." I say as if it was obvious, raising my eyebrow.

"Yeah... Obviously, but.. Where the hell did you get the idea you could kiss me?!" She says angrily, crossing her arms. I let out a defeated sigh, hating how right when I think I've gotten to her, she puts her guard back up.

"Lil, don't act like you didn't like it.. You kissed me back." I say sitting down on my bed and rolling my eyes.

"Don't fuckin call me that!" She says as she walks over and shoves me. Before I can say anything, she walks out of the room. I let out a frustrated grunt, and pull my blanket over me, too tired to deal with Lilly's drama.

* * *

I wake up and look over at the clock. It's 7:42, earlier than I usually get up. I look over and Lilly is still sleeping. I roll my eyes and let out a sigh, remembering the frustrating situation from the night before. I grab some clothes and hurry out of the room, heading towards the bathroom. Before I can continue down the hall, I hear a familiar voice and stop in my tracks.

"Where you headed?" Ashley asks, pulling her earphones out of her ears and placing her Ipod on the bench beside her.

"Oh, I was just headed to get Patty so I can take a shower."

"I could take you." She says, looking away shyly. I offer her a grateful smile and accept.

"That would be nice. Patty gives me the creeps." I say, letting out a laugh as she escorts me down the hall.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. That's kind of how me and Amber started hanging out, she offered to take me once, and back then she seemed so nice. I guess it all just went downhill from there. I was just so happy to have a friend.. ya know?" She says, frowning. At the mention of Amber's name I become angry, but quickly calm down when I see how upset Ashley seems to be.

"Yeah... I understand. People will do crazy things for friends..." I say more to myself, thinking about my own situation.

"Yeah.." She says quietly.

"You know, my offer still stands. If you ever get tired of Amber, I'm here." I say, smiling as we walk into the bathroom and I sit my things down on the bench.

"I couldn't... You don't know what Amber is capable of." She says sadly, sitting down on the bench beside me.

"Don't worry about it, I'll deal with Amber." I say as I stand up and start to take my shirt off. When I pull it off I look down at Ashley who is beyond checking me out. She swallows hard and lets out a shaky breath.

"M..Miley.. Your body is...... amazing.." She says, staring at my torso.

"Thanks..." I say shyly, looking away to hide my red cheeks.

"How do you stay so fit?" She asks, finally looking up at my eyes.

"I was in cheer leading for a while." I say, slowly unbuttoning my pants, feeling a bit embarrassed.

"I wish I had your body.." She says, standing up and walking closer to me. I swallow hard and try not to get too nervous as she gently places her hand on my stomach. I let out a quiet yelp at the contact, the skin burning under her touch.

"wow.." She says breathlessly. I look down at her, her eyes meeting mine. I quickly get lost in her eyes and reach my hand up, placing it on her cheek. I look at her nervously, and she returns the nervous look. I let out a shaky breath and move in to kiss her, not being able to resist. I move in slowly, watching as she nervously looks down at my lips and then back up at my eyes while biting her bottom lip. I place my other hand on her cheek and go to kiss her, but the sound of somebody walking in pulls me out of my trance. I quickly pull away, clearing my throat as I see Lilly walk by.

"So.. Umm.. I better take my shower.." I say nervously, pulling my pants down.

"Yeah..." Amber says quietly, sitting back down on the bench while looking away nervously.

* * *

"So Ash, thanks for that. I hate having Patty take me." I say as we arrive at my room.

"No problem, it was my pleasure." She says smiling and biting down on her bottom lip. I subconsciously lick my lips at her actions, leaning back against the door to try and keep from falling due to the lightheaded feeling.

"Well... bye....." I say smiling ear to ear.

"Bye." She says, pulling me into a hug. I quickly wrap my arms around her, and fall into a trance as her scent hits me. I take in a deep breath, loving her invigorating scent. She pulls away and my hands linger on her back.

"Bye.." I say again breathlessly.

"See you around.." She says, walking away backwards, still looking at me. I smile at her actions and walk into my room. As usual, Lilly was reading. Geez that girl needs to make some friends.

"Hey." I say simply, putting my dirty clothes away and flopping down on my bead. I let out a content sigh, lost in my thoughts of Ashley.

"What was all that about?" She asks, pulling me out of my trance.

"What was what about?" I ask, sitting up and looking over at her confused.

"You and Ashley in the bathroom. You were all over each other." She says simply, not taking her attention from her book.

"Oh.. that.... I don't know.. I guess it sort of just.... happened." I say, smiling at the thought and laying back down.

"I noticed that it sort of just happens a lot with you." She says, smirking. I look at her in disbelief and throw a pillow at her.

"Hey!" She says, smiling, grabbing the pillow and throwing it back at me playfully.

"Oh hell no!" I say playfully, jumping off of my bed and attacking her with the pillow. We both let out fits of laughter as I continue to hit her with the pillow. She tries to grab it, but I pull it away causing her to grab her own pillow and hit me back. I pull her pillow away from her and throw it across the room. Smirking at her as I continue to hit her. Somehow I end up on her bed, straddling her while continuing my attack. Soon enough, I let go of the pillow and we both erupt in laughter. I don't know what was so funny, but we just couldn't stop laughing. I stop laughing, and try to catch my breath. I look down at her and see her smiling up at me, still laughing a bit. Soon enough, the smile leaves her face, and she's looking at my lips. I take the hint, and move down slowly, catching her bottom lip in a slow kiss. I pull away to try and read her expression, not wanting a repeat of last night. She looks at me and smirks.

"See, I told you. It just sort of happens a lot with you." She says, still smirking. I offer her a small smile and let out a laugh, looking down at her, admiring her beauty.'

"I like this Lilly. Where has she been this whole time?" I ask, but she doesn't reply.

"Seriously..." I say, waiting for her answer.

"Miley... I..." Before she can finish a knock on the door interrupts her.

"You better get that.." She says simply, obviously happy for a distraction.

"Yeah.." I say, climbing off of her and going to answer the door. I open the door and see Ashley standing there with her hands in her pockets, looking nervous. I smile a bit, noting how adorable she looks when she's nervous.

"Hey Ash, what's up?" I say, totally forgetting about the moment with Lilly while getting lost in her eyes.

"I was umm.. wondering.. If maybe you and I could like.. eat lunch together......." She says, but I don't answer, I just raise my eyebrow curiously.

"I mean.. Not together, together! I mean... Umm.. Like... we could.. Umm hang out.... I mean... I was thinking about what you said, and I really could use some help getting rid of Amber." She says, looking up at me hopefully.

"So..?" She says, biting her bottom lip nervously.

"I'd love to." I breath out, finally coming out of my trance.

"Cool..." She says smiling, walking away backwards, her gaze not leaving my eyes.

"Cool.." I say, not able to say much more.

"See you later?" She says hopefully.

"Definitely.." I say smiling ear to ear like an idiot.

"Cool." She says simply before turning and walking away.

I close the door, and lean against it, letting out a sigh while still smiling ear to ear.

"So.. You.. uhh... like Ashley?" Lilly asks, pulling my out of my trance.

"What?" I ask, looking at her confused.

"Do you like Ashley?" She says, looking down with an unreadable expression on her face.

"Yeah... Why?" I ask, curious about her attitude.

"No reason.." She says, looking up with a sad expression on her face.

"Seriously... Why?" I ask, not believing her answer.

"I was just wondering, damn!" She says, getting up off of her bed and walking past me, bumping into me purposely. I turn around, completely confused, but instead of an answer to my suspicions a door slams in my face.

"Geez." I say, walking over to my bed and lying down. Just when I thought Lilly was opening up, she closes up again. What's up with her? It's like she was suddenly nice when I started talking to Ashley. Like she doesn't want me to like her or something. And what's with all the questions. We've barely even talked the whole time I've been here and suddenly she opens up. I mean.. She didn't even seem mad when I kissed her, but all of a sudden Ashley shows up and kind of sort of asks me out and she gets all pissed off.. _Whoa...._ I suddenly realize what I should have realized last night. _She's jealous_

* * *

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I know, I know, I'm horrible. But there's been a lot going on. Don't worry, I'm going to be back to my speedy updates. Anyways, I hope you guys liked it. Sorry about the drama, I just love it. :] R&R ppl :P**


	7. Maybe I'm the one with problems

**I don't own anything.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

It's been about an hour since me and Lilly's argument. She never came back to our room, and I can't find her anywhere. _I give up. If she wants me, she just needs to come right out and say it. I'm tired of these mind games._

"Hey Miley, ready for lunch?" I hear a voice call from behind me.

"Huh, lunch?" I say, turning around to see Ashley looking at me expectantly.

"Oh, yeah.. Lunch. Yeah, I'm ready." I say, suddenly remembering the arrangement I had made.

"Cool..." She says smiling, walking with me towards the cafeteria. None of us talk for a bit, she seems to have something on her mind.

"For a second I thought you forgot." She says, looking away sadly.

"Me? Forget? Psh, noo.. Hey, have you by any chance seen Lilly around?" I ask, still curious about her whereabouts.

"No, why?" She asks, giving me a curious look.

"No reason." I say as we walk into the cafeteria.

"Ash, over here!" Amber calls, waving at her expectantly.

"What do I do?" Ashley whispers to me, looking afraid.

"Just tell her how you feel, I'm here for you, it'll be ok." I say, grabbing her hand and giving it an encouraging squeeze.

"What's _she_ doing here?" Amber says, standing up and crossing her arms as we walk over. Ashley doesn't reply, instead she just looks over at me with pleading eyes. I take the hint and give her hand a quick squeeze.

"_I'm_ here to show Ashley what a real friend is like." I say, crossing my arms, while taking a threatening step closer to Amber. Instead of replying, she just lets out a small laugh.

"You're joking right?" She asks, raising an eyebrow. I don't reply, but look over to Ashley expectantly, who in return gives me an apologetic look.

"Ashley, get the fuck over here and ditch the loser." At first Ashley doesn't move, but I know what's coming. I let out a breath and wait for the inevitable.

"Ashley!!" I look over at Ashley who flinches a bit, and walks over to the table, sitting by Amber. I just shake my head at Ashley, not even sure what to think. She looks up at me with a sad face and mouths _'sorry'_, but I just shak my head and walk away. I don't even know how to react right now. I thought Ashley was ready to stand up to Amber, but I guess it's just gonna take some time. I don't even know what to do, I can't deal with drama right now. Not from Amber and definitely not from Lilly.

* * *

"Woah, watch it!" A voice yells from the floor beneath me. I had been so caught up in my thoughts I hadn't even realized I bumped into somebody.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry Lilly!" I half scream, trying desperately to help her up, but she rejects my offer, and slaps my hand away.

"Whatever.." She mumbles as she starts to walk away.

"Lilly, wait!" I scream, grabbing her wrist and turning her around.

"What!?" She screams, but as soon as our eyes meet, she seems to calm down a bit.

"I'm sorry Lil.. I didn't see you.." I say quietly, tucking a stray hair behind her ear and taking a moment to graze her cheek before pulling my hand away.

"It's fine.." She says quietly, looking away.

"Lilly... We need to talk about this.. You can't just keep running away from it, I know you feel it to.." I say sadly, lifting her chin so her eyes are met with mine.

"Lilly.... don't deny this.." I say softly, placing my hand on her cheek and moving in slowly, lessening the space between us. Her eyes flicker down to my lips and back up to my eyes, but soon the facade returns.

"We don't have anything to talk about!" She says cruelly, shoving me away from her.

"Lilly, don't do this.." I say sadly, moving closer to her and grabbing her hand which is soon ripped away from my grasp.

"What does it matter? You like Ashley." She says bitterly, taking a step back and sitting down on the bench beside us, turning away to look out the window sadly. I follow her and gently place my finger on her chin, forcing her to look up at me.

"Lil, if you'll just be honest with me, and tell me how you feel, I won't go for Ash. You've just got to take a chance though.." I say softly, inches from her face as I move in to kiss her. At first she doesn't move, and I catch her bottom lip in a slow chaste kiss, but before I can deepen the kiss she stands up and begins to pace.

"No, Miley... I can't.. I.... I don't feel anything for you like that..." She says, walking over to the wall while resting her forehead against it. I become sad at the sight, not fazed by her words that are obvious lies. She looks so upset, so confused. I walk over and gently stroke her back, desperate to rid her face of the pained expression.

"Lilly, I like you... and I think you might like me back... but I can't be sure with all these mood swings.." I say sadly, turning her around to look at me.

"Mood swings? What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" She asks, becoming angry and crossing her arms.

"Lil, one minute you're nice, the next you're a total bitch. One minute I think you like me, the next you act like you'd rather be in a swimming pool full of ferocious sharks than be with me. I just can't be sure with you..." I say simply.

"Well you're half right. Sometimes I would rather be in a swimming pool full of ferocious sharks than be with you." She says bitterly, crossing her arms.

"Whatever Lilly.. fine." I say, crossing my arms too, becoming more angered by her words as they hit me hard, causing a shooting pain in my heart.

"Fine."

"Fine." I say, becoming more angry. "I'm going to go out with Ashley then, since you'd rather be with sharks than with me. Hope you have fun swimming with the fishes." I say, raising my eyebrow, hoping that by threatening to get with Ashley, she'll give in.

"I'm sure it'll be way more fun than sharing a room with a bitch like you." She says, shoving past me and stomping off down the hallway.

"Ughhhhh!!" I scream in frustration, leaning against the wall and sliding down to sit on the floor. All my anger soon turns into pain, and I am soon replaying the argument in my head over and over.

* * *

Great, it's time for art. Just when I want to be alone, I have to go sit in a room with the two biggest bitches in this place for an hour.

"Ok, today we're going to focus more on music rather than art." Mrs. Wilson says, as we all sit down in the chairs. I look over at Lilly and notice that she had sat as far away from me as possible. She notices me looking at her and rolls her eyes at me, I do the same and scoff, while returning my attention to Mrs. Wilson.

"So does anybody in here have any musical talent?" She takes a minute to look around, but the only one raising their hand is Amber. I roll my eyes, but decide against speaking up about my own talent, still a bit too shy.

"Anybody besides Amber?" Amber lets out a disgusted scoff and gives Mrs. Wilson a dirty look.

"Ok, well Amber, show us what you've got." She says, handing amber the guitar.

"Thank you. Now, I'll show you losers how it's done." She says, as she begins to play the guitar. She wasn't half bad, but I could definitely do better. I immediately recognize the song. It's breakaway by Kelly Clarkson. I like this song, but try not to gag at her singing. She's trying to hard, she needs to learn to just let her voice flow naturally. I look over at Ashley who is obviously enjoying Amber's singing. She's dancing along and mouthing the words. I roll my eyes at her antics, feeling extremely jealous. _I can do better._

"Thank you Amber, that was lovely. Does anybody else want to go?" I look around, nobody seems to be volunteering. I look over at Amber and Ashley laughing together. _If all it takes is a song to win her over, then I sure as hell __will__ go._

"I'll go.." I say quietly, my voice trembling, causing Amber, Ashley, and Lilly to look at me, completely shocked.

"As if you can beat that, go ahead and try Stewart." Amber says, raising her eyebrows to challenge me. I simply roll my eyes, knowing full well that I _could_ beat that. Besides, it wouldn't be fair to let Ashley go on with her life thinking that the pathetic excuse for singing she had just heard was talent. I owe it to her to show her what real singing sounds like, or maybe I just really wanted her attention. Either way, Amber would be the last thought on Ashley's mind after hearing me sing, and that's all that mattered.

"Miley.. You can sing?" Ashley asks, surprised, causing Amber to slap her shoulder. Ashley flinches and gives Amber an apologetic look. _pathetic._

"Better than her, that's for sure." I say, grabbing the guitar from Mrs. Wilson. _If she won't stand up to Amber, than I just have to fight for her. _If something as simple as a song can make her smile, than I plan on bringing that amazing smile I had just seen to a new level when she hears what real talent sounds like. Not to be conceited, but Ashley seemed extremely amazed by Amber's little show. One word, disgusting.

"Alright Miley, let's hear it." Mrs. Wilson says, flashing me an encouraging smile. I let out a shaky breath.

"Ok... This is a song I wrote a few months back." I say nervously, looking over at a smiling Ashley for encouragement.

"Like anybody cares.." Amber says, rolling her eyes. I ignore her comment, and let out a shaky sigh as I begin to strum.

_These four walls,_

_They whisper to me_

_They know a secret_

_I knew they would not keep_

I look over at Ashley, who's mouth is agape. I smile a bit, flashing her a wink before I continue to sing.

_Didn't take long_

_For the room to fill with dust_

_And these four walls, came down around us_

_It must've been something, sent me out of my head_

_With the words so radical,_

_Not what i meant_

_Now I'll wait for a break in the silence_

_'Cause it's all that you left_

_Just me and these four walls again_

I look over at Lilly and notice a look on her face that sends chills down my spine. I try my hardest not to drop the guitar and run over and throw my arms around her. I let our another sigh and continue singing, averting my gaze over to Ashley instead. Not willing to deal with my feelings for Lilly that I wanted no part of at the moment.

_It's hard now to let you be_

_I won't make excuses,_

_I've made my peace_

I begin to strum louder, getting lost in the song. Looking over at Lilly, momentarily but soon closing my eyes at the sudden pain I felt while looking at her.

_Didn't take long for me to lose the trust_

_And these four walls, were not strong enough_

_It must've been something sent me out of my head,_

_With the words so radical,_

_Not what i meant_

_Now I'll wait for a break in the silence_

_'Cause it's all that you left_

_Just me and these four walls again_

I begin to lose myself in the song, begining to strum harder than before, now singing louder. I close my eyes, and try to forget about Lilly, suddenly thinking about how much this song reminds me of every time me and Lilly get in an argument. I try my hardest to block out the thoughts as a small teardrop rolls down my cheek.

_Yeah_

_It's difficult_

_Watching us fade_

_Knowing it's all my fault_

_My mistake_

_Yeah, and it's difficult_

_Letting you down_

_Knowing it's all my fault_

_You're not around_

_It must've been something sent me out of my head,_

_With the words so radical,_

_Not what i meant,_

_Now I'll wait for a break in the silence_

_'Cause it's all that you left_

I let out a shaky breath and finish the song quietly, trying to recover from the state it had put me in.

_Just me and these four walls again,_

_Again, mmmm, oh, me and these four walls again_

I open my eyes and see everybody staring at me with their jaws dropped. Suddenly I hear applause fill the room, and my mind is at ease. I relax a bit, not feeling as nervous anymore, momentarily forgetting the pain I had just felt while thinking about Lilly.

"Thanks..." I say nervously, letting out a small laugh. I look up to observe the room. Amber is sitting there looking completely shocked, I smile at her, and she looks away, crossing her arms. Ashley is still clapping, smiling wide at me. I blush a bit and wink at her, but soon I can't help my actions and my eyes wander to Lilly. I offer her a small smile in which she doesn't return. She just turns away. I let out a defeated sigh and hand the guitar back to Mrs. Wilson.

For some reason, my heart keeps telling me I want Lilly, but she keeps breaking my heart again and again. I can't deal with it anymore. As much as I want Lilly, I know that I can't handle the pain anymore, I've just had too much of it. I have to find something that can make me happy, somebody who's not ashamed to want me. Somebody like Ashley.

* * *

After I got up the nerve to sing, everybody in the room seemed to loosen up a bit. More people decided to show off their talents. It turned out, there were some extremely talented people in the room. A girl named Joanie showed off on the violin and pretty much blew me away. How could she not have volunteered? She was amazing! Then there was a girl named Laura that could play the piano, and I mean wow! She sure as hell could play. Then there was a girl named Jill who wanted to learn guitar, so I showed her a few easy chords. I can honestly say that she was a natural.

The room seemed to become more friendly, and there was less tension. Everyone seemed a bit more open, and there were several conversations taking place in the room. I sit there silently thinking as they all continue to mingle and experiment with all the instruments. I can't help but glance over at Lilly. She doesn't seem phased by any of this. She looks as if she's in a trance, deep in thought. Either that or she's just really bored and can't wait to leave. She briefly looks over at me, and I look away quickly. I'm just not ready to look back into those eyes after what was said between us. Rejection hurts, but it hurts even more coming from such an amazingly beautiful girl like Lilly. The first girl I've ever had feelings for, the only one that I have such intense feelings for even to this moment.... Even after that fight. I just can't wait around for her, though. It's much to painful. I'm having a hard enough time dealing with my past, I don't need any more pain at the moment. I need to concentrate on something that makes me happy, or someone. Which brings me to Ashley.

My eyes wander across the room to Ashley who is sitting by the window with Amber. Amber seems to be babbling about something non important, and Ashley is just staring out the window, obviously not paying attention. I so badly wanted to walk over there and save her from the pointless banter that looked more like extreme torture. I wanted to go over and do what I've been wanting to do. I wanted so badly to kiss her. Were these feelings just me trying desperately to rid my mind of these powerful thoughts about Lilly? Was I desperate to rid my mind of this pain, no longer wanting to want but not be wanted? Was it just my own little form of a rebound? Maybe, maybe not. I want so badly to deny my assumptions and just pretend I like Ashley, and I'm not gonna lie, I do. But it's nothing in comparison to the feelings I have for Lilly, the feelings I fear will never fade. Maybe I just want to be wanted.

I take a moment to look over at Lilly and am immediately hit with a wave of pain, surging through my heart. I can't even stand to look at her. It's worse than staring outside that window. It sucks wanting something you can't have, especially something I want so bad. I'd rather look outside that window and observe the outside world, wishing to be part of it again. That pain is nothing in comparison to looking at Lilly, and feeling such want, but seeing no similar wants in return. It pained me more than the first day I looked out that window, looking at something I wanted but couldn't have. Now, Lilly was all that I wanted. She seemed to become more important to me than the outside world. The world that had failed me, the world that I had such high expectations for but it soon became nothing more than a pathetic excuse for a life. That place was nowhere that I wanted to be. It made me feel sick, hurt, dead, empty, _nothing_ in comparison to how safe I felt looking into Lilly's eyes. The eyes that now show no emotion when I look into them. After our fight, she put her guard up even more than I thought possible. She won't even look at me, let alone acknowledge my existence. I don't know how I'm going to manage being here while having to put up with such torment day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute.

I blink, suddenly feeling a teardrop rush down my cheek. I look up, falling out of my trance, and my eyes are met with Lilly's. _nothing. _She quickly looks away with a blank expression on her face, as if she had just been looking at a wall, nothing important. I suddenly feel the pain become all too overwhelming, and my feet drag me out of the room before my mind can object.

* * *

I'm running down the hall crying, not knowing where I'm going, not caring. I end up at the bathroom, and rush inside, running into the nearest stall. Out of nowhere, I am overwhelmed with a feeling of nausea, and can't help but fall to the ground throwing up into the toilet involuntarily. I begin coughing and gagging as there is nothing left to throw up, and lean against the wall beside me, pulling my knees to my chest, completely exhausted. I begin crying harder, unable to take the pain.

I sit there for hours, not moving. I hear people come in and out, but it doesn't phase me. I just know that I can't go back to my room, not with her there. I have to do something. Anything to get rid of this aching pain within my heart.

I stand up slowly, walking out and going over to the mirror. I quickly clean up my face, rinse out my mouth, pop a piece of gum, wipe away my tears, and fix my hair so I look at least presentable. Suddenly, I act on impulse, and walk out of the bathroom, heading down the hallway. I know exactly where I'm going, who I'm going to see, but why I'm going to see her isn't exactly clear to me. I don't want to admit to myself that I'm just using her to get over Lilly. Besides, sometimes, when I'm with her, I totally forget about Lilly. And that's what I needed right now. To forget about Lilly.

I let out a sigh and knock on the door, praying to myself that her and Amber aren't roommates, and that she's alone.

* * *

**Ok, ok, I know it got intense out of nowhere, but the drama is necessary and it will all pay off in the end. I just hope you guys don't hate this chapter too much. I know it's a bit boring, and it's just Miley and her depressing thoughts, but it was necessary for the future chapters. I just needed for Miley to be in pain right now, that way Ashley can comfort her. ;] ergo drama! :D Hope you guys don't hate it too much. I'll try to update tomorrow. R&R ppl :P**


	8. Caught in the middle

**Sorry I haven't updated in forever. I might get back at it once I'm off break and back in school. That way I can procrastinate on my homework and just write when I'm bored. But if I do that, nobody better tell me to stop updating and do my homework. :/ That means you Mariana. :P  
**

* * *

_knock knock knock_

I let out a nervous sigh and cross my fingers, hoping Amber isn't the one to answer. To my surprise, Ashley opens the door and a huge smile appears on her face.

"Miley! What are you doing here? Are you ok? You ran out of art class earlier and nobody has seen you since.." She says, appearing more than a little worried.

"I'm fine.. I just needed some fresh air.." I say, letting out a sigh, embarrassed that she had noticed. "Can I come in, or will Amber have a problem with that?"

"What Amber doesn't know won't hurt her." She says with a sexy smirk on her face. I bite down on my bottom lip, trying desperately to fight the urge not to kiss those gorgeous lips.

"Oh.. So she's not your roommate?" I ask curiously as I walk in, noticing that one half of the room was empty and the bed was unoccupied.

"No, Mikayla was. I'll probably get the next girl to get admitted as my roommate." She says simply. A frown appears on my face which doesn't go unnoticed by Ashley.

"Miley.. What's wrong?" She asks, grabbing my hand and pulling me down to sit by her on her bed. "Nothing.." I let out a small laugh. "It just kinda makes me wish I would have done it a couple weeks later. That way I would at least have you as a roommate.... and not Lilly..." Suddenly, as I mention her name, I feel my heart sink. All the memories begin flooding back and I remember everything that was said between us in the hallway.

"Yeah, that would have been fun....... Then I could have done this.." Suddenly, she wraps her arms around my neck and presses her lips forcefully against mine. I quickly reply the kiss, grateful for the contact from this gorgeous girl. I slip my hands around her waste happily accepting the chance to touch this girl that makes me so week in the knees. She smiles into the kiss and slides her tongue against my bottom lip. I grant her the access and our tongues hungrily slam together. We fight for dominance and I win. I take the chance to explore her mouth, loving every second of it. Soon enough, we pull apart desperately needing air.

"Wow." she manages to get out between her gasps for air.

"Trust me, the feeling is mutual.." I say, letting out a small laugh. I look into her eyes and smile, not able to say much more as her beauty puts me in a trance. She follows my actions and stares into my eyes. Before long she reunites our lips with more passion than before. I reciprocate the passion and slide my tongue against her bottom lip, happily accepting the kiss but wanting more. She grants the access and lies back in her bed, pulling me down on her. Feeling her body pressed against mine turns me on immensely and I hungrily speed up the kiss. I bite down on her bottom lip and tug on it, causing her to moan a bit. She lifts her leg and presses her knee into my center, which makes me moan out of shock and pure pleasure. Suddenly, a knock on the door breaks us apart.

"I better get that." She says quietly, her warm breath hitting my face, turning me on in the process. I let out a soft disappointed sigh and climb off of her, allowing her to get up. She walks over to the door and opens it.

"Amber?! What are you doing here?!" She says in a worried manner. I simply roll my eyes.

"Umm.. Can you hold on a second?" She quickly shuts the door and turns to look at me with panic evident on her face.

"Miley.. You can't be here.. She'll freak out.. You have to hide!" she says worriedly in a quiet tone. I question her motive, but decide against asking her right now.

"Here, get in the closet.. I'll try to get rid of her." she says, quickly opening the door and shoving me in.

"But.." before I can finish, the door slams in my face. "Sweet Niblets." I whisper out of frustration. Luckily, there are slits in the closet door so I can at least see what's going on while I'm forced to hide in here.

Ashley hurries over to the door and opens it. Before even being invited in, Amber allows herself in. _Typical. _

"What was that all about?! I don't wait for anybody." Amber says, placing her hand on her hip. I roll my eyes at her words and continue to watch.

"Sorry about that..." Ashley says quietly, appearing worried.

"It's ok baby, I know a way you can make it up to me.." She flashes Ashley a playful smirk and raises her eyebrow, causing me to gag. _baby?_

The next thing I know, Amber throws Ashley on the bed and jumps on top of her so she's straddling her. _What... The.. Fuck?!_

"Umm.. Amber.. I can't right now. I was umm.. About to take a shower..."

"Don't worry about it babe. Just trust me, you'll need one even more when we're done." I try my hardest not to gag at the sight before me, secretly hoping it'll be over soon.

"Ok, fine Amber.. but close your eyes.. I have a surprise for you." Amber closes her eyes and Ashley climbs out of bed and runs over. She opens the door and leads me over to the bedroom door. She goes to shut it, but I put my foot in the door so she can't.

"What the hell was all that about?" I say angrily, trying to keep my voice down.

"I'll explain later.." before I can say anything more the door is being slammed in my face.

I walk down the hall, heading towards my room. I take my time on my way there so I can think about what just happened. So Ashley and Amber are together? I guess that explains a lot. But I thought I had a chance with Ash.. Maybe I do. I mean, she wouldn't be sneaking around with me if she was satisfied. And she wouldn't ask for my help to try and get rid of her. Wait a minute. No wonder she wouldn't stick up to her in the cafeteria or in the hallway. There's only so much I can do. I mean it's obvious now. Ashley didn't go through with it because nobody knows they're together, and she probably didn't want Amber to make a scene in the middle of the cafeteria where everyone could see. Now that I think of it. It's kind of obvious they were together.

***Flashback***

_"What was that Stewart?" Amber says rudely, causing both me and Ashley to look up. Ashley takes a step back, clearing her throat and rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly. I suddenly become pissed at Amber for interrupting my moment with Ashley._

_"I said, if Ashley were to decide to make a smart decision, I'd gladly show her what a real friend is!" I say, walking up to Amber and crossing my arms._

_"Oh and you think she'd actually leave me for you. Looks like you're even more delusional than I thought. Come on Ashley." She says, walking away. Instead of following her, Ashley just stands there staring at the ground. I smile a bit at this, hoping she'll just stand up to Amber._

_"Ashley!" She screams, and of course, Ashley follows, giving me an apologetic look before running after Amber down the hall. I feel a bit sad by this, but know that it was her decision and I couldn't do anything about it. I let out a sigh, and walk in the opposite direction towards my room._

***End of flashback***

That explains why Amber said Ashley wouldn't "leave her for me", and why Ashley always does what Amber tells her to do. It's so obvious they're together. I guess I just didn't want to see it or let myself believe it.

* * *

I walk into my room and as usual, Lilly is reading. I decide against interrupting her since I'm already too upset and I don't need any more drama.

Just as I had expected, Lilly gives me the silent treatment. I grab my iPod out of my dresser and get comfortable under my blanket and turn it on shuffle.

The next thing I know, I wake up to the sound of knocking on the door. I look over to find Lilly asleep, so I get up and answer it. I open the door to find a nervous looking Ashley.

"Can I come in?" she asks, not even looking up from the ground as she plays with her hands nervously.

"Sure, just be quiet. Lilly's asleep." I step aside and let her in. She walks over to my bed and sits down. I close the door and follow her to my bed and sit next to her.

"Sorry you had to find out that way.." she says quietly, still not looking at me.

"Yeah.. I wish I would have known before you kissed me.." I reply quietly, trying to hide the hurt in my voice.

"I should have told you..." She says simply.

"Yeah, that would have been nice. That way I wouldn't have had to hide in your closet while Amber pretty much had her way with you. Not exactly what I expected to happen when I came to your room.." I say, the hurt in my voice now evident.

"I'm sorry... You weren't supposed to find out that way.." She says quietly.

"It's whatever.. Look, is there something you needed to say? I'd like to go back to sleep, and we're probably gonna wake Lilly up. Trust me, that's not something you want to do." I say rudely, not wanting to deal with Ashley after she lead me on.

"I broke up with her..." she says quietly, finally looking up at me with hope filled eyes.

"Really?" I ask, unbelieving, and perhaps a bit to loud. I hear Lilly rolling over in her bed and I look over at her, hoping I didn't wake her up. Ashley places her hand on my cheek and forces me to turn and look at her.

"Perhaps this will be enough proof for you." she leans in and places a slow chaste kiss on my lips. I smile up at her once she pulls away, not able to form words.

"Look.. I'm sorry if it seemed like I lead you on, but I've been trying to break up with her for a while now. I guess I have you to thank. You kinda helped.." She says shyly, looking away.

"How?" I ask confused, not quite sure how I helped.

"Lets just say Amber always peeks when I tell her to close her eyes..." she says simply. At first I don't get what she means but then I catch on.

"You mean.. She saw me come out of the closet?!" I say a bit too loud. Me and Ashley erupt in laughter at the double meaning of what I said.

"Shhh.. We're gonna wake her up." I say, still trying to calm down from the laughter.

"Well.. You could always come over to my room and we could finish talking there.." she says shyly with a smirk on her face. I bite my bottom lip at her actions and consider taking her up on her offer.

"Tempting, but sorry.. I shouldn't. Besides.. I know exactly what you mean when you say "talking"." I say, using air quotes to emphasize my point.

"Ok, you caught me." She says smiling. We both laugh a bit and I walk her to the door.

"So.. I'll see you tomorrow?" she asks shyly.

"Definitely." I reply before leaning in and kissing her.

"Well... Bye.." she says nervously, obviously not wanting to go.

"Bye." I say smiling and waving like an idiot. When she's finally out of sight I shut the door and lean against it, breathing out a content sigh.

"That was repulsive.." Lilly says suddenly from her bed, breaking me out of my thoughts of Ashley.

"Somebody's jealous." I reply in the same bitter tone she used.

"In your your dreams." She says simply before rolling over and going back to bed.

I don't reply, I just simply lay back down and try to ignore Lilly. For once her bitchy attitude wasn't turning me on, but instead actually annoying me. Maybe it was a sign that this thing with Ashley could actually be good for me, and help get my mind off of Lilly.

* * *

I wake up in the morning to an empty bedroom. I look over at the clock and see that it's 8:32am. I wasn't very surprised that she was already up. She normally gets up earlier than me. I grab my clothes and go down to find Patty so I could take a shower. I figured it would be a little more awkward to have Ashley take me now. Besides, I needed to shave, and Patty has to be there in this case.

After my shower, I head down to Ashley's room, hoping to find her there so we could eat breakfast together.

_knock knock knock_

"Come in!" Ashley yells through the door. I do as she says and allow myself in. I find Ashley fixing her hair. She smiles at me in the mirror.

"Hey there.." She says, finishing up on her hair.

"Hey, you wanna grab some breakfast with me?" I ask, while sitting down on the empty bed.

"Are you asking me on a date Miley Stewart?" She asks, smirking at me in the mirror.

"Maybe I am." I say, walking over to her and slipping my arms around her waste flirtatiously, hoping my actions will get her to say yes. I place a soft kiss on her neck, and begin sucking softly on her pulse point. She lets out a soft moan, letting me know that she likes it. I continue and bite down softly and replace my teeth with my tongue before beginning to suck on it again.

"So.. What do you say?" I ask before I continue my attack on her neck.

"S...sounds...g..great.." She says, after which letting out another quiet moan.

"Good, hurry up and get ready." I say, ending my attack on her pulse point and placing a quick kiss on her cheek before walking over and sitting back down on the bed.

"God, you're such a tease." She says playfully, while finishing up on her makeup.

* * *

Me and Ashley walk down the hall hand in hand enjoying the silence. Suddenly, when we turn the corner, there are several girls circling what looks like a fight. Me and Ashley immediately rush over to get a closer look and find out who was fighting.

As soon as I see that Lilly is one of the girls fighting, I let go of Ashley's hand and rush in to pull Lilly away from the other girl.

"Oh look, speak of the devil, here's your slut roommate now Lillian." Amber says bitterly, while getting off of the ground. I ignore her comment and help Lilly up.

"Lilly are you ok?" I ask placing my hand on her red cheek and caressing it with my thumb.

"I'm fine, just leave me alone.." she says, while walking away.

"I knew you had a thing for that sociopath Miley. It's so obvious." Amber says, causing me to turn around.

"What?!" I look over at Ashley who appears to be sad. By now all the girls have left expect for me, Amber, and Ashley.

"Is that true Miley?" Ashley says, appearing hurt. At this, Lilly stops in her tracks and turns around with an expectant look on her face.

"Yeah Miley, tell her the truth." Amber says crossing her arms. I look between Ashley and Lilly, not quite sure what to say. _I could tell the truth and hurt Ashley, or I could lie and possibly hurt Lilly. But the chances of Lilly caring about whether I like her or not are very slim. I mean.. She doesn't care about my feelings.... _

"Well?" Ashley says, appearing more sad.

"No... No I don't..." I say quietly. At this, Lilly's face drops and there is hurt evident in her eyes. She then shakes her head and walks away.

_Or does she?_

* * *

**Ok so like I said, this story is going to take a while to get to the Liley, which is why I update this one more often than Lilly You Can't Fix Everything. But anyways, I'm going to update that one soon too. I'll try to update more often, but it's just been complicated. Sorry. Anyways R&R ppl :P**


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